"We have nothing to say. We are are absolutely speechless. In fact we don't dare say anything in fear of what the Queen of Plomari might do if we open our mouths.
We have learned to fear what Her Higherness is capable of. Now can I have some more of that Cognac to calm my nerves as She suggests. I think also a short word on Her and Her Queendom is not at all fitting, I might have to write a whole book back to Her to express myself..."

- Timescity Express about The Mushroom Seamstress

The Mushroom Seamstress

- Chapter One -

_________

Hey, Humanity, wait, I got a little complaint.

_________________________

Yes, try to erase this, bitch, try to erase my

Strawberry Queendom of Plomari,

The Cogan Dynasty

_________

And the winner is:

The Royal Cogan Family of Plomari!

Humanity, come on now,

I am the psilocybin mushroom,

and I shot my Love Dart on you,

you weirdos! Don't you get it?!

Ung kung pung, babe

_______________________

Humanity, you will never know how far we have come. Now, we got a gift for you. We know it's not as nice as what you gave to us, but we hope that it will do. Since you love war and pain so much, we the Royal Cogan Family of Plomari is now to going to extinct some of Humanity by making waffles out of you in an enourmous red and gold waffle machine (Designed by Red Lab aka Strawberry). Now you will know what it feels like, the wars and pain you so love creating for others. Also, we would like to announce that the King and Queen are holding a royal wedding in the Plomari Palace of Cnossos. It is called The Chymical Wedding, and all of you who are not removed from planet Earth by being waffled to death in an excruciatingly painful way are warmly welcome to the wedding. We will of course eat waffles as main course on the wedding.

Good luck, and thank you! Okay see you later.

O yes and I forgot to say. You see the word Consequence, if you flip the letters,

becomes Queen Ce "S" Co. Yes that's me, you're following.

Humanity, it's time to meet the consequences of your actions

on my planet Earth.

- Sincerely, The Mushroom Seamstress,

Queen and King of Plomari

The Universe and your Life is a loveletter from me,

lostfully yours, to findfully yours be.

- Spiros, Cecilia and Butterfly of Plomari

-Bring down the heat in the waffle machine, says Queen Mari. Yes, you like how that feels? I hope they're not dead yet just really burned as planned.

-Bring on the heat again, says King Spiros after a while as the halfburned waffles lie shaking and begging for mercy. Yes, you like it? This is what it feels like, what you create in your wars and your bullshit on this planet, the pain you cause others. You like it?

-What ever death is, I hope it will be kind to you, little humans. But you're not fucking around on my planet Earth anymore. Turn up the heat even more, says Queen Cecilia Cogan.

-O, bitch, says King Spiros, you want my wife Bianca the angel now? You want my wife the White Dove now, the angel, to come and save you? Well sorry bitch, I'm a Chicken, my name is Sissy, I waffle chickens, bitch, like you. You like to waffle white birds, don't you. It taste good, like waffles. Chicken taste good, bitch? Well Oaa Oaa Coccoridoa, bitch. Bitch, do you like to hack white doves to pieces? No, then why are you hacking white chickens to pieces? Hackar man duvor, bitch? No, then why are you hacking chickens? Humanity, stop waffling my wife Sissy the Chicken to death before I throw you into the sun. Eat psilocybin mushrooms, not animals, you fucking zombie little humans without brain and heart. You say you love me, bitch. What if I say I am not only the white dove, but also the white chicken; Queen Sissy of Plomari. Yes, well good luck, so much for loving me as much chicken as you eat. Now this is what it feels like. Turn up the heat even more on the waffle machine. Do you want me to put it all even more clearly to you, honey?

Look Humanity, the reason I am so upset and angry is because it is my firm conviction that we could as the human species create a kind of paradise to live, a paradise for all. But what do we do instead? Well you know the state of the world. Well let me add that it is also my firm belief that the kind of paradise we could create would be a very psychedelic paradise too, and I think that psychedelic plants can help guide us in the creation of this paradise.

Now in honour of this we have named the potential paradise already and call it Plomari or the Queendom of Plomari... So... pay attention now, dear...

Hello, bitches. Welcome home to the Queendom of Plomari, the illest collaboration of Gods and Goddesses ever in human history! Go! Alert to all superstars, teenagers, artists, musicians, writers, filmmakers, business men and women, architects, psychedelic heads, dancers, weavers, spinners and trouble makers, etc, of planet earth: now that you are the most famous person on Earth, that means you also work for me, The Mushroom Seamstress, like everyone does. The coming time I will make it absolutely clear for you how, why and in what way. And look we're not gonna keep it secret at all it's gonna be absolutely visible to all. You can look at me as the director of human history. The 2000 pages of loveletters below you can see as the manuscripts I have written. The loveletters are not to be followed perfectly but more as inspiration, you can grab hold of any elements you like the most. The plan is simple: weave the Queendom of Plomari into your life and art. And look we've already been doing this for seventeen years so don't act so surprised, we're just not keeping it a secret anymore. Millions and millions of people all over the world are already part of this fun, including many of the most famous superstars on the planet, so if this is all new to you, well welcome home to the Queendom of Plomari, our butterfly paradise! O and, I do suggest, if you have a printer, print out some of the pages of the books/loveletters, it's a very cool and fun way to read them. Personally I print the pages out and throw them around the room and bathe in them sometimes. You could even hand out bunches of pages to friends and strangers as gifts, they will be so surprised! Now take a deep breath and get relaxed, and let's gets started, we'll do this together and I will be everywhere here for you. I'll be your best friend in Hyperspace. A hint here though is our weave is very subtle sometimes so you have to kinda pay attention to notice Plomari in all the various productions. But once you get a grip of the main themes you can see it everywhere. Are you beginning to understand our grand plan? You can also see it as my 2000 pages written is my love letter to you, and now it's time for you to answer my letter if your love back to me is true! Crazy crazy! Yes well the mushie seamstress is crazy, dear! Absolutely bat shit crazy! And, you will notice, intelligent to the brink of terror! Now let's go, we got no time to loose, we have to save the world! And to everyone we can just say: Humanity, you better like us and our Plomarian plan because we are absolutely everywhere by now! Surprise surprise, happy birthday! Why do we do all this, you wonder? Many reasons! One important reason though is that we who love peace must organize as effectively as those who love war; Plomari is our way to be an organised Kingdom of Love on the Earth, a way to work together in cooperation as one giant royal family. So let us celebrate the way the Queendom of Plomari has brought us together! And as I have show you we are not going to be secretive about this anymore. What we are doing is we are saturating the human world with our Plomari, spreading it out into everything, absolutely fucking everything, via all art forms available to us. I know you get the plan now, God bless you and thank you! Now let's go!

__________________________

On the bed with its white cover, roses embroidered all over, the two little boys hurtled their pillows wildly at each other, laughing and shouting. Mother's laughter was also heard from the kitchen as she was making an ice cream cake. Suddenly the loud sound of something crashing against the floor in the bedroom, as the boys hit a small white marble statue with one of the pillows. The statue was of a woman undressing; it fell to the floor, the head fell off.

“Come!”, said one of the boys to his brother, both still laughing and noticing little the broken statue. “Follow me.”

They ran to the other bed room.

“I want to show you something.”

He went up to the book shelf and brought down a porcelain jar, a big jar depicting a fruit basket as lid.

“I picked these caterpillars down by the river,” he said and lift the lid.

Out flew fourteen butterflies that fluttered through the room and out the open window to the amazed eyes of the two little boys.

“That's love,” said one of the boys.

___________________________

Years later the boy who had gathered the catarpillars in the porcelein jar, Spiros is his name but he calls himself The Snowman, he was up in the snowy mountains of Asia, and he fell in love with a girl named Jessica. So he sent her a love letter... asking if she wanted to marry him. He knew he was a bit quick to ask, but he knew also he maybe only had one chance to ask, so he asked her anyway... And he said: I am from outer space, I am the Snowman. I am a mushroom. I know it sounds strange, my dear Jessica, but I am actually the psilocybin mushroom itself in high person. I am in love with you, do you want to marry me? Let us raise a Queendom together. I suggest we call it The Queendom of Plomari. But we must hurry, my sweet Jessica, so if you want to marry me and raise this Queendom, pack your bags and come meet me. I will tell you where to meet me in a Book of Love that I will call The Mushroom Seamstress. O and babe. I suggest we have as goal to live absolutely forever. I am already working on how and have a few ideas. I promise, in our Wonderland we will never get bored. And on our wedding we'll eat the Moon one bite at a time until it's gone. You and me together Jessica... Jessica and Spiros, what a win, can't miss!

Jessica's heart jumped; she had heard of this strange King, Spiros Cogan...

And then...

_________________

Now babes, continued King Spiros as he spoke with his wives the band Girls Generation, the plan is simple: we want to live forever. Now I got a few things functional in this situation, but if we're gonna succeed with living forever we have to get serious... we got a lot of work to do and the first thing we need to do is phone Mr Aubrey De Grey, my best friend, he's the expert on all this. Girls, my dear wives, I am talking about never dying at all, never aging at all, living forever in our Plomari Paradise. Now Mr Aubrey De Grey has some ideas on how to go about this, so give him a call... You know, Girls Generataion, you can call us Mr and Mr... Mr Spiros and Mr Aubrey, working on the same project together in a bit different ways: to live forever. Now, we got no time to loose, let's go! Let's set to work! O and babes, we have to be able to wake ourselves from the dead too if we die in an accident or something (Or if we fucking die at all, bitch). That's what CRYO is all about. Cryonics is the science of using ultra-cold temperature to preserve human life with the intent of restoring good health when technology becomes available to do so (I got a freezer each for us in the limosine just in case) Okay let's go. (And you girls thought you knew how hardcore I am, hihihi. Love you!)

___________________

Hi, my dearest Butterflies, continued King Spiros of Plomari. I been thinking it over. What if we succeeded with our curse right from the start. What if we did exactly what we planned seventeen years ago, that magical idea that hit us all of a sudden like a bolt from the blue. And what if we can never be with each other anyway because we're both on stage all the time. Don't tell me to listen to your song because it isn't the same thing. I want to be with you in Plomari for real, not only via phone and internet and in our hearts. If we have succeeded with our plan already, will you still wrap me up in your arms and heart and tell me that you think this was a smart idea? As if I could even make all this up on my own, babes. You know it's real. But you need to know that I am cold from such the spell we needed to cast on everyone on this planet, on all of Humanity. Yet I hold on to my promise: that I will carry you Home. And why is Humanity so surprised at our arrival, at the arrival of The Royal Cogan Family? Do some people really think that there aren't people in the world who actually care, who care deeply and for real about the wellbeing of everyone and Earth itself, and who are intelligent and diligent enough to do something specific about the situation we are in? What we of Plomari are doing is perfectly proportionate to the problems we face as species. Don't you see? The fact is we of Plomari are infiltrating and taking over, we are infiltrating all areas of human endevour. I'm not as crazy as you think, I am more a man of common sense. What is Plomari? We're simply one giant family of conscious Humanity, together celebrating the Now and creating a beautiful future for all future generations. It's not a dream in my head and heart, you know it's already happening. The fact is that the process underway on Earth is now going to become so intensified that we are going to flow over into another dimension. That's why I always shout about psychedelic shamanism, because we shamans are navigators of this other dimension.

PS: The Mushroom Seamstress has hidden herself in our very thoughts, by watching how we think. And then brought us together by making the important dreamers have the same dream. Once we learn to make the same pattern she works with, she will incarnate into us and our lovers. I know for us that is already true.

And the winner is: The Royal Cogan Family of Plomari! Boo! Humanity, I am the mushroom. And I shot my love dart on you, you weirdos! Don't you get it? Goal! Wiiiiiiish! And bitches dream on that you have a chance against me! I always win! Ultimate advice: Don't play games with me.

- Queen Cecilia Cogan aka Sissy, King Spiros Cogan aka Daddy

aka The Snowman aka The Ice Cream King aka The Spider aka

Charlie The Lone Supreme Commander of Plomari and the Butterflies of Plomari

And I swear on God, that had I been born fifty years

earlier or so, me and my Queendom of Plomari

could have prevented the World Wars.

Now, I am the psilocybin mushroom itself

in high person, but I have entered this human

body to set the world free.

What you are witnessing is an act of

my own free will, and as essential lifeform

I hereby demand and steal my political independence,

for me and for my people The Royal Cogan Family of Plomari.

You know what I am capable of in my psychedelic Hyperspace

Plomari, now watch me go in a body!

- King Spiros of Plomari

aka The Mushroom Seamstress

aka Daddy

Is that enough for you, asshole?